A5 Women Do Things Best
Yulia Davudi من ⁺Hassar ⁺Baba-čanga في Sydney, Australia
One day, there was a mullah, a mullah. In the village people were sitting talking a lot together. One was talking with the other, men. Those Muslims—the men are by themselves and the women are by themselves. The men were saying ‘What a woman—a female—can do, no man, buffaloes or ploughs can do.’ Buffaloes are so strong. Ploughs—those things that cleave the ground, plough. Do you understand? Yes, they cannot do it. ‘A female is stronger than anything, when she wants to do something.’ The mullah having eaten in (his) house, having had a drink, having had a shower, having scrubbed his back—they loved him very much—says ‘What is this talk? A woman is weak. They call women weak, that is she is inferior. What is a woman that she can do something for a man?’ They say ‘No, what a woman can do a man cannot do.’ The mullah takes notice of the other mullahs, the other people. He comes home and confronts his wife, saying ‘You, a woman, what could you do for me?’ She says ‘Nothing, what shall I do for you?’ He says ‘They say that what a woman can do no man can do, nor can buffaloes or ploughs do it. So, what are you? What are you? What will you do for me? For example, if you want to do it, what would you do?’ She says ‘Man, with respect, do not take any notice the opinion of people. We have a beautiful life. They want to destroy our life. Why have you taken notice of the opinion of people?’ ‘No, come on, let me see what you want to do. Come on, what do you want to do?’ He starts to beat her and shake her. ‘Come on, let me see what you will do.’ She says ‘God, the mullah has lost his mind.’ He says ‘Let all your family lose their mind! Why should I lose my mind? Come on, I want to see what you will do.’ She says ‘Do you want this? Do you really want this?’ He says ‘Yes, I want to see what you want to do.’ The mullah used to go and plough, plough, in the countryside, in the field, he would plough, with two oxen. The woman went and bought from the market two very large, white fish. She took them and put them in the ground, there, in the place where the mullah would plough. The mullah goes in the morning, he (ploughs and) goes one furrow, the second furrow, the third furrow, the fourth furrow, suddenly he sees—oh!—fish have come out! He is very happy with them. He takes them, cleans the soil off them and puts them aside. The wife brings him lunch, to him, to the field. (This is) because women would cook food and take lunch to the men who were working outside. (If) she had a child, she would also carry the child on her back and take him (with her). She had to take (things) with this hand and that hand, and with the child on her back she would take food to her husband, to the people. She brought bread there. The mullah said ‘Do you know what?’ She said ‘No.’ He said ‘Two fish—I was ploughing and two fish came out of the soil. These are the fish. You should take them, wash them, clean them, and cook and fry them. I shall come in the evening to eat them.’
She takes the fish and laughs. The mullah comes back in the evening, exhausted and tired. The entire day he has been driving the plough behind animals. He has a shower and come to sit to eat (his) food. He sees that there is a bowl, a big bowl of yoghurt water—yoghurt water, they would beat yoghurt, they make it into milk, they call it yoghurt water, (they put) salt in it and water. This is yoghurt milk. She put out for him a large bowl of yoghurt together with bread. He drank a little of the yoghurt water and said ‘But how have you done the fish?’ She said ‘What fish?’ He said ‘The fish, the fish.’ She said ‘What fish? Surely you had not gone to catch fish, you had gone to plough in the field. Fish are in the river.’ He said ‘Wife, please, this morning (when) I was ploughing, I caught two fish and gave them so that you would cook and fry them and I would come to eat them.’ ‘By God, this mullah has lost his mind.’ He got up to beat the woman. The woman got up and ran to the people in the village. ‘Oh help’ she shouts. All the men and women came out. They all knew one another, you see. ‘What is it? What is it?’ She said ‘The mullah has gone mad. He has gone mad. ‘Hey, mullah, excuse me, what has happened? Why are you beating this wife of yours?’ That son of a dog! That son of a dog! That son of a dog! ‘I brought fish to her and she says “Fish from where?”’ They say ‘What fish mullah?’ The woman says ‘He says to me “I brought fish from the field, fry them!” so that I fry them for him to eat. But I do not have fish. He then set about beating me.’ All those friends of his say ‘Oh God! God have mercy on the mullah, he has gone mad.’ ‘Oh mullah, you have gone mad. You have lost your mind. It is not possible at all for a fish to be in the field, in the soil!’ ‘Oh woe!’ He hits his head. He says ‘Oh woe (for what I have suffered) from the hand of a woman. You were speaking the truth.’ He goes out running and going (on his way). He goes to a miller—a miller, he makes wheat and flour, he has a water-mill, a water-mill. He goes and knocks on the door. His wife opens the door. His wife knows (the situation). He says ‘I shall not enter. I shall not enter a place in which there is a woman.’ She says ‘Come in. (If) you enter, you enter. (If) you do not enter, I shall right now cry for help (saying) that you came upon me—you know, (she means) in order to rape me.’ He is obliged (to do so) and enters the house. He is the friend of her husband. The miller comes back from the water-mill. They embrace one another ‘Oh hello, hello, what a surprise to see you! Sit down. I am very happy to see you.’ They eat and drink. The miller went to wash his hands and so forth. The wife of the miller said to the mullah ‘In the evening I shall lay my (sleeping) place here and the place of my husband over there. I shall lay also your place over there. When I kick (you), get up and come to me. If not, I shall scream and the miller will get up and kill you. I shall say that you mounted me’. The mullah was very distressed and says ‘I have fallen from a pit into a well, I have fallen into another fire. What has come upon me? Why have I ruined my life?’ It becomes dark and they go to sleep. The woman slowly stretches out her leg (indicating) that the mullah should get up. When the mullah gets up, she changes her place. She changes her place and her husband ends up in the hands of the mullah. The miller sees that he has mounted him—excuse me, excuse me—and seizes him. He screams and says ‘Light a lamp! Light a lamp! It is dark. Light a lamp so that I can see why this son of a dog has mounted me.’ The woman says ‘I forgot to tell you, we do not have a lamp. We do not have oil. Give him into my hands and you go and bring a lamp from the neighbours.’ The miller goes and brings a lamp from the neighbours. The woman says to him ‘Go and sleep.’ She goes and brings a calf from below, from the stable. She brings it upstairs and grips it. When he lights the lamp, he sees that the guest is asleep, the mullah. The heart of the miller bursts (with fear). He says ‘Oh woe, I hope he has not heard.’ She said ‘This calf desires you so much that he is used to you and it came to lick you, to lick you, but you thought that he mounted you.’ He says ‘Go and put it back in its place. I am going now, I do not want (anything). I am ashamed that this guest of mine will get up when I have thought such a thing about him, perhaps he has heard. I am going, you know how to put him on the road. The miller goes off. She gets him up saying ‘Get up, go and tell your wife “I made a mistake. Forgive me, pardon me. I did not know. I did not understand,” then she will bring the fish and place them in front of you.’ He goes and say to the wife ‘Forgive me. I don’t think I knew what a woman is.’ She said ‘Yes, you think that a woman is nothing. But a woman is a human being in her own right, she has a mind and she has understanding.’ He says ‘I beg forgiveness.’ She says ‘Now sit in your place.’ Afterwards she fries the fish and brings them and puts them before him, he eats (them).